I once told a friend of mine that I used to be a big rebel in the past. What I actually meant was, I have become rather flexible in some aspects of life. But she immediately replied, now that you are reading books, you’ll stop being a rebel. Oh’ excuse me!?!?!
But I have no idea where the notion of rebellion being bad came from. Reading became my habit very late in life, when I was around 17 before which I was good at submitting to values and beliefs. It was the books that I read which helped me become a rebel. Why, I’ve been happier when I became one, because I didn’t have to do things that I didn’t any faith in. Absence of rebellion is submission. I stopped submitting to things that didn’t make sense to me anymore. I was happier.
If somebody hadn’t rebelled would the world be like this today? Only because someone rebelled to being a slave, freedom was given. Only because someone rebelled to walk, the wheel was invented.
If I hadn’t been a rebel, I would n’t be here now, doing what I’m doing. I would still be working in IT from 9 to 9, leaving my child at a day care. Not a free person, able to do anything I wish. If Hubby hadn’t been a rebel, he would happily working 9 to 9 and aiming to do the same until 60 years of age.
Our families still don’t believe that we are working to retire before hubby is 35 years old. Oh well, that’s rebellion, but we are building our family’s future, an empire, rather than living from pay check to pay check, which we would have been doing had we submitted to the old values.
Why yes, rebellion is good.
Do I submit?
Yes, I do submit to a faith that keeps my spirit up. Yes, I do submit to a mentorship that has proven to work. And yes, I do submit to my family’s emotional and moral requirements.
But rebellion is good.
Archive for December, 2009
Pappu has been talking with a small girl (he calls girls bigger than him as akka) in my mother’s neighbourhood in india. He knows that his grand parents are living in india.
Pappu: mama?
Me: I’m right here.
Pappu: papa?
Me: he is here too.
Pappu: akka?
Me: which akka are you talking about?
Pappu: india.
When did he grow up so much?
What do people say when they reappear after 2 months of sudden absence? Hmm, well, the reason for my absence is….
Anyway, I don’t have any particular reason because the concept of ‘not having enough time’ doesn’t even exist. I just didn’t want to write even though I had quite a lot to write. My childhood habits are still taking over every now and then. The habits that I totally ignore these days and let it do whatever funny stuff it wants to.
I have always had so much to do. I could paint well, I could sing and dance pretty good, recently I started writing too. And then I had to read continuously for 3 days in a stretch without caring much for food and sleep. Oh yeah, I really did that when I start reading any novels. I just had to complete it before putting it down. And there were times when I couldn’t breathe without listening to music. All of my so-called habits had designed my life. I’m an addict.
My hobbies are like my alter egos. Every now and then, one of my hobbies take over and pull me into it completely.I forget everything else and I don’t even struggle my way out. People used to say that this is the factor that pulls me down. I was under that impression too, until recently when I decided that I need freedom; freedom of choice, freedom of decision, freedom of time, freedom of money and freedom of hobbies. When my heart flows for something, I give it my fullest potential. But I can’t afford to think, I’ve been painting nicely these days, so I need to force myself to paint until I become a master of painting. If I find my interest shifting from painting to writing one day, I’d rather start writing when my passion is completely into it, rather than forcing myself to write when I really don’t want to.
I’m probably one of those very few addicts that are proud of their addiction.
