Category: He said; She said


It’s been long since I wrote anything blog worthy. I could go on and convince everyone that I had been busy doing things, taking care of toddler or consumed in painting. But that’s not the truth. I didn’t write because… just because!

No, I was not suffering from a blogger’s block. Could someone be having a writer’s block when they have so much to write about?

I could have written about how wonderful my son is and how he is learning to ride his tricycle.

I could have written about how he responds to all my positive speaking madness all these months and he behaves like an angel, that when he sees the yellow alarm button in the lift, he smiles and and never attempts to touch it anymore even though I never said “No” to him.

I could have written about how happy I am about our new prayer routine holding each others’ hands every night in bed and even communicating our dreams regularly.

Or I could have written about how lousy I felt on diwali day morning when hubby and son were still asleep and that I wrote a post about how I missed diwali in India and then hubby remarked that my post passed a negative energy to him talking only about what I do not have right now and I immediately took that post down without any explanations to my dear readers.

I could have written about how we went shopping to one of the busiest places in singapore and I had to change son’s poopy diaper sitting in the most uncomfortable position and his toddler butt doesn’t clean the way it used to when he was a new born that I convinced myself that I would wash him well when we reach home and I passed his diaperless body to hubby, attempting to put on his diaper. I could have definitely added how hubby got poop on his new formal shirt and how his angry and disgusted face suggested to me that he might cry in front of anyone and how I rolled on the floor laughing.

I could have written about how I usually record my ideas as voice message in my phone and how one night just when my son and hubby had slept, I got a flush of follow up ideas to my “where is god” post and how I also felt lazy to get up from bed and that I whispered into my phone those wonderful ideas. Oh yeah, I should have added that I wanted to listen to my ideas now and all I could hear was strong ‘S’ ‘S’ ‘S’ sounds with the hum of the fan in the background. I have no idea what I had been thinking that night!

I could have written about how my posts are getting longer and longer these days and that I have to admit that I hate reading long blog posts.

Too many things to write about. May be I was just thinking too much that I found it difficult to settle in front of the computer. May be I should start another NaBloPoMo. May be.

Is love immeasurable?

Is it unusual to ask one’s spouse how much he or she loves them? May be not for reassurance, but for fun? How about a conversation like this?
Woman: On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you love roti?
Man: 6
Woman: on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you love dosa?
Man: 9
Woman: on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you love me?
Man: 15
Woman: on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you love Pappu?
Man: 20
If you were the said woman, what exactly would you feel?
a. Happy that your husband loves you immeasurably (count exceeding the scale actually means immeasurable)
b. Sad that he loves you a little less than he loves your son
c. Proud about the kind of love that your husband possess for your son
d. All of the above

[25] Proud Father II

I was talking with a friend of mine who recently had a baby. We discuss about various personal things and more often it’s either about our babies or hubbies. We found something. Men are proud. Very very proud when they have a baby!

I still remember when I was pregnant, hubby took care of me and our unborn baby so well. But hubby didn’t seem as much excited as I was. Of course, he was all gaga about the pregnancy and even claimed that he should be the one to break the news, even to my parents. But about the baby, he talked nothing of.

During the following weeks, he accompanied me to all our prenatal appointments. He never missed one. We either fixed the appointments on weekends even if it’s more expensive, or he takes some time off and joins me to see the doctor. But he never joined me in guessing if it was a boy or a girl, in listing names for the baby, in window shopping baby clothes even though we had no plans to buy so early, in singing to the baby and even in waiting patiently in front of me to catch the baby’s movement every now and then. I often argued had a loving discussion with him about why he showed no interest in our baby. And he would say that he was just so excited as I was about the whole pregnancy but he cannot do much for the baby he has never seen or touched. He said “as a woman, you might have felt like a mother as soon as you knew about the pregnancy but as a man, I will become a father only when I hold the baby in my hands”. Makes sense alright!

And he was right. The moment the baby was born, he was a father. That too a good father. He loved the baby very much and he could carry him around. But he couldn’t make him sleep. He couldn’t bath him. He couldn’t feed him well. That said, dads cannot do much of  ’caregiving’. But it is their pride that amazes me.

The way he handles his child’s ego is amazing. He is a great friend and he doesn’t want to restrict him. As long as he is safe, it’s a green signal. He participates actively in my positive speaking program and teaches his son. There must be some reason why Pappu always prefers dad over mom, right?

There were some of these days when I made a mistake regarding Pappu. I had never seen hubby as furious as he was those days. Rather than feeling hurt or angry that he was mad at me, I felt warm, smiled,  and at the same time had tears in my eyes.

[20] Proud father

They both form a team. When they are together, neither of them care if I’m there or not. Except (Of course, there’s always exceptions) when the son is hungry or has a soiled diaper.

proudfather

That’s when he marched his father up and down the staircase.

We have started colour coordinating them both. They wear their denims together, except when hubby is at office, Pappu still wears his jeans. Pappu wears his cotton pants and khakis during our business conferences (even though he waits outside the room, he wants to present himself professional too). While they both are in denims, their t-shirts are of same color. This little red t-shirt was bought in the same color of hubby’s old red shirt, which is in the store room right now, of which hubby knows nothing. I told him that I burned that shirt, should he dare to wear it once again!

A few months back I wrote this. So did my friend Saji. Now I thought of starting it as a tag and share the fun with others.

Here are the rules:

  • Link the person who tagged you.
  • Post the rules on your blog.
  • Write 10 things about your spouse you are thankful for. Feel free to expand the list if you feel more grateful.
  • Ask your spouse to do the same and if he/she is willing to, then post that in your blog too.
  • Tag 3 other bloggers and let them know that you have tagged them by leaving a comment in their blog.

Here’s what I had written on this topic.

And so I tag:

  1. Asaaan
  2. Monika
  3. ArtNavy

[5] Picky fathers

Yes, you read it right. I DID mean “Picky fathers” and not “fathers of picky toddlers”.

Did I mention that hubby is a picky person? May be not. Because I normally use the phrase “a man of unique taste” to describe him. Sometimes I love it too, for I shall be considered one of his unique likings ain’t I? His unique taste blends over all aspects of life. This is probably one of the dozens of differences we both have.

I love to keep a wardrobe full of clothes of different styles, while he prefers to buy only a handful of shirts and pants which he will repeat over and over again, (a) until it gets completely worn out or (b) until his wife threatens to throw it away unless he buys himself a new set of clothes. Thankfully, option b happens before there is even a chance of option a. I suppose that he would more likely choose option a, well, given a choice.

I prefer to look beautiful, even if it meant that I should wear some uncomfortable clothes. But he chooses comfort over good looks. But sometimes I follow him. For the kind of casuals he chooses, one could even go to bed in those clothes if need be. Now, I call that as comfortable.

Last week all three of us went shoe shopping. Even though the main idea of shopping was to get the much needed sandals for hubby, I managed to buy a shoe within 5 minutes in the first shop and even commented that I’d be the only woman present there who bought a shoe in 5 minutes. In the next shop in another mall, we bought Pappu’s shoes. Then we visited a few more shops before he found what he had wanted in a shop which was last in our list. I was surprised that the kind of shoe that he had imagined in his mind was even available in the stores. I thought I would have to have it custom-made from Red Tape. It looks nothing out of the ordinary. But he is particular about the texture of the insides, the material of the outsides and many other things that I didn’t even want to know.

And then it comes to food. I love to try different cuisines, while he runs away from restaurants which have unknown items listed on their menu cards. More often, I’d have to drag him along with me to try some new food promising that I’ll get him a better dinner once we get home, if he couldn’t ingest the new food. He’d agree and tag along with me. Sometimes, he comes to like the food more than I do and we frequent the restaurant often. But most often, we never go there again.

One of my dear friends told me that her hubby is a bad critique but a great taster(tester?). He eats anything that she makes. I laughed and replied that my hubby is a great critique. He can find exactly what’s wrong in the recipe. But food refuses to enter his food canal once he found out that something is wrong, after all.

What amazes me most is, this man didn’t fail to make a big impact during our first meeting. For all the differences between us which was obvious, he chose what many people would not dare to. We were opposites in all that I could think of at that moment but he believed that he had found his perfect match. In fact, this is one of the very few things where the saying “opposites attract each other” really works. This is also one of the few things that I’m secretly thankful for, every day in my life. The differences, that keep our relationship alive with fierce passion along with the similarities that actually bonds us.

My life is great

Who said money can’t buy happiness? It clearly does buy happiness, along with many other expensive goodies. (It’s only a bit difficult to digest the whole truth that money can buy happiness and beyond, if you keep money under control and not vice versa.)
We’d been too busy the past few months that we couldn’t find time to shop. As a result, I was repeating my clothes all the time and the other day Hubby wore tennis shoes to beach coz his sandals were worn out.
We spent the past 2 weeks shopping for them all. It was totally fun. I didn’t have time to blog, cook, eat and sleep. So I post photos here and try to convince you that it is of course a valid blog post!

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We started with this for pappu after we lost his squeaky snoopy shoes. (Now I’m going to all the places we had been to during the past few weeks in an attempt to find them. Somebody will return it to me)

Clarke's Shoes

One of these days we went out to buy Hubby’s sandals but came back home carrying enough clothes for all of us and shoes for me and Pappu.

Shoes

My shoes

Oh please don’t ask me. I don’t moisturise my skin, alright.
And then we bought a denim overalls for Pappu. I’d been planning this one for so long. I was right. Denim overalls are the cutest things on earth.

Denim Overall

We did finally find the sandals Hubby wanted in one of the shops (Only one shop in all of singapore? Hubby sure is a man of unique taste).

Father and son

You spend a whole long day of shopping and you will still feel energetic. And you spend more money filling up your tummy and then you ask your Hubby to get some pictures and tell him to ignore your belly. He does, but the poor camera, it doesn’t know how to ignore the 2 kilos of extra fat hanging on to your tummy.

SIGH!!!

And not to mention, the joy of spending money even gets to the face of your one year old.

july09 226

(For concerned souls, we did not buy these glasses for him.)

The week of joy

Last monday was our wedding anniversary. Like everybody says, I do not believe that it is 3 years already. But what everybody doesn’t say is, this was the first time we celebrated our anniversary. Because we had planned to celebrate the day we met instead. And I never remembered to celebrate the day we met. And my mother reminds me every anniversary day in the morning. So we decided to celebrate wedding anniversaries starting this year. I made a great lunch complete with payasam (a famous dessert in India). Hubby worked from home, by which I mean, he stayed home with me and played with pappu.

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But celebrations was not over yet. Friday was my birthday, and this time hubby took leave to really stay home with me and play with pappu without guilt.

This is what I got as a gift. Especially after last year’s gift from Hubby, this birthday had sure raised my expectation.

teddy bear family

The white baby bear opened and I found this inside…

ring

And the surprises were not over. There.. oh.. something was written on the inside.

inscribed

Ah! The fun of receiving. All our names were inscribed on the inside of the ring. Oh dear, my darling Hubby has mastered the art of gifting…….

This is my fourth birthday since my wedding and my parents were with us for 2 of the birthdays before this. 2 years back on my birthday we went to a good restaurant and had a romantic and expensive dinner. Finding us by ourselves this time, we decided to do the same, a romantic and expensive dinner. Only to do it for lunch because we had some appointments at dinner time. By the time we got ready and brought our clan to the restaurant, it was 4 o clock and they told us that we reached too early, for dinner, period. We filled our stomach with starters and patiently waited for dinner. It was romantic enough, alright, in a dim, candle lit room with soft music where we found it extremely challenging to chase the running toddler and to keep him from bumping against people and things. It was an exciting time anyway, and expensive. That I understood by looking at the bill.

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After that we went to a business gathering and I received this. I never knew I had so many friends in singapore. I’m really thankful for the crowd.

card

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And last night we invited some friends over for dinner and I cooked. All by myself. Anyway it was a success and we all had fun.

Dear Hubby,
Here’s my list, as promised!

  1. You are ready to admit when you are wrong, even in the smallest of issues, which I kind of cover it up.
  2. You are a great learner and you do not give up easily.
  3. You make breakfast everyday, giving me enough time for making lunch, without having to wake up earlier than I do now.
  4. When you are not in office or at a business appointment, you are with me.
  5. Even though you are not a gift giver by nature, following my cues, you brought me the best gift last year.
  6. When you are around, the baby isn’t scared of anything.
  7. You make the baby laugh out loud like I could never do.
  8. You do not give opinions on my looks, you accept me whatever way I look.
  9. You make sure that I take my vitamins everyday.
  10. You remind me to drink water!
  11. You read my blog even though blog reading is nothing of your interest.
  12. At times you can survive with the simplest of foods available.
  13. You have no bad habits.
  14. You are very concerned about nutrition.
  15. You always make sure that we have the best quality things around us.
  16. You are ambitious, you want to be your own boss and you know the way to achieve your dreams.
  17. You are a lovely social being. People love to be around you.
  18. You are proud of yourself, for whatver you are.
  19. You are proud of me and our baby for whatever we are.
  20. You love me just the way I am.
  21. You are very forgiving. You know how to love people even if they have done injustice.
  22. Strong that you are, you never showed a face when the nurses had to poke you many times in an effort to draw blood for test. But when the same happened to our son, you lost control, got angry with the nurses for doing that, and you cried.
  23. Still you are emotionally strong. If not for you, I would have rushed the baby to the emergency room a dozen times last year even though he was perfectly normal all this while.
  24. You pamper me like a child whenever I need to be pampered.
  25. You have always been so understanding.
  26. You don’t force me into anything.
  27. You have a clean heart and you don’t hide anything.
  28. We both share a lots of interests, giving us enough chances do lots together.
  29. Finally, I’m just thankful that I have so many (more) things to say about you even though it was supposed to be just 10. And you complete me.

HubbyandSon 

Happy 29th Birthday, baby!!!

With Love,

Myself.

10 positive points about your spouse?

“Ten? Just ten? Who can’t write ten points about their spouse?” was my response before I first decided to try it out myself. I was excited about the whole idea and resisted to urge to start writing before hubby came home. I announced that he would expect a half an hour activity when he got home. I would rather say he was a bit disappointed when he found that this was the activity I mentioned.

Sweet that he is, he agreed to go on with this activity. When dinner was over and the baby was sleeping, we each sat down with our notepads and pens and started writing. The page began like this. “Write down 10 positive points about ___”

I started numbering my points. Number one. And was stuck for a while before I decided one really good quality of my husband and wrote it down. The second point took rather more time to reach the paper. When I was still pondering about the third, hubby announced that ten is rather too much. We could downgrade the list to 5 points. When asked if he could not write just 10 good points about his wife, he said “oh dear, I know that the other 5 points are somewhere out there, it’s just not coming to my mind right now”. I agreed, but inwardly I was ashamed to admit that I, on the other hand was stammering at my 3rd point.

After some time, we both were done with our 5 points each and shared with each other. It was funny. Somewhere in between, I had written “My husband is very practical”. Then I thought ‘but then sometimes he is too practical. That wouldn’t count as a positive point”. And so I striked it off. One of the points of hubby read “She talks her mind. Doesn’t care about others while speaking (Both positive and negative)”.

The whole exercise was interesting like this. Then we both agreed that we would fill up the rest of the page in the coming days, as and when we remember things. Well, we are improving. I’m sure that pretty soon we will buy 2 new “positive points about my spouse” notebooks.

I should say that it works. Even though our list was only 5 points, it was good to know that our spouse has high regards for some quality of ours. We don’t regularly talk such things with our spouses do we? So why not just write it down?